This little cute, fuzzy, bunny has come to our house. He goes on adventures with my kids every night. He is charming and witty and is NEVER boring. He helps my children get out of the worse jams. Who is this bunny and where did he come from? This is Flopsie. He is an imaginary friend who comes to life in my stories. The children love this character so much that they beg me to tell them a new story every night. "Mom, what will Flopsie do tonight?" I will smile and tell them they will need to wait and see. OH THE EXCITEMENT!! Children go running off down the hall as fast as they can to brush their teeth and go to the bathroom. They jump into their beds and pull the covers up over their heads and giggle knowing that a new adventure will be happening.
The story always starts the same.....Once upon a time there was a little bunny named Flopsie.... The children giggle with muffled laughter under the covers. They are hanging on every word that comes out of my mouth. Oh the happiness i feel bringing my children joy!
Our story started out with a little boy who turns his hair blue by accident. He befriends a bunny and they go off with each other trying to undo the mess, before the little boy's mother finds out. The children giggle when we get to the part that the bunny has a grand idea to put mud in his hair.."Maybe this will get the blue out?!?" says, the bunny. Sashi yells at the tops of her lungs "NO MOM, IT WON'T COME OUT THAT WAY!" Why i ask? "Mom the mud is dirty...giggle...it won't work." Ian is listening with huge eyes. I love his eyes they tell all. He wants more and he loves bunnies and why cant i tell these stories all night long!!
Tonight i ended the blue hair story, but tomorrow i can guarantee there will be a new adventure...

I think i am going out of my mind

I think my family is causing me to go out of my mind. I want to scream and yell at the top of my lungs, for everyone to just quit it! I am tired of the silly games this family plays. I understand that everyone comes to this world with different challenges that we are suppose to solve while we are here on earth. I also understand that we have to be patient with people, because they might not be at the same level of understanding. I understand that some people just don't get it...even if it is glaringly obvious. Just because i understand all of this, doesn't mean that i like it. I want to jump up and down on certain members of my family's feet....."WHY DON'T YOU GET IT?!"
I have tried to take sides and not take sides. I have tried to completely take myself away from everything. It truly is a no win situation. Family will find you and drag you into something even if you do not want to go. They get angry when you don't choose a side. They want to know what you think, even if you swear you don't know. Ugh. Family, is wonderful...but why on earth cant we get along?

confusion

As i sit at my computer tonight, i hear my husband playing his new video game with his friend. I hear the familiar laughter of men chuckling at each other dying from an animated punch to the face or kick to the groin. I smile knowing my house is slowly turning back to normal.
The month of July has been a whirl wind of excitement. I have had cousins, friends,in laws, and a father came and visit me. I have been going non-stop for almost 4 weeks solid. I have watched children...sometimes 12 at a time, for days on end. I have found that i have patience that i never really knew i had. I have told countless stories to little children with eager eyes and played games until my mind was almost numb. I have missed sleep knowing that my days were not going to change for a long time. I missed my period for months on end, because of the nervousness i must have been internalizing without knowing it. I conquered, it all! I am proud of myself. I didn't shirk from my responsibilities...i carried through...and i am happy that i succeeded.
I have been wanting a quiet place for a long time, but now that i have it...i don't think i like it. I like having family around. I like the activity that comes with little children all around. I like having my father sit by my side watching movies with me. I like the Chaos. I like it. Please don't get me wrong...i like the quiet and sometimes crave it. I like being able to think without having a little one breathing down my neck wanting me to give them another glass of milk. But, there is a little confusion i am feeling...do i really like the quiet? I am missing my family.
I do think families are suppose to live somewhat close to each other. So you can "pop" in on them every once in a while. Families are wonderful and i miss mine.